Not all relationships are built to last. It’s quite rare for your first few relationships to be with the guy you’ll end up spending the rest of your life with. That said, it’s often difficult to figure out when it’s time to break up with your boyfriend, especially if you’ve been together for a while. Here’s how to know if it’s time to move on.
Your boyfriend might be a great guy, but it’s possible that you’re just not compatible. Sure, he may look good on paper, but if you’re not as satisfied in the relationship it’s probably time to call it quits.
The Obvious Signs It’s Time to Break Up with Your Boyfriend
If you’re on the fence, here are 8 signs that it’s time to break up with your boyfriend. Just remember that although the short- to mid-term might be tough, happier times are most certainly on the horizon. Let’s get started then.
#1. He’s not interested in your family
Not everyone immediately jumps at the big family barbecue, but part of relationships include making compromises. If he’s constantly a no-show, it leaves a bad impression on your relatives. It’s literally him saying, without words, that his plans take priority over your life. When you break up with your boyfriend, expect a ton of support from your family. Especially if they never even got a chance to know him due to his tendency to dodge.
#2. You’re afraid to break up with him
It’s not because you know it’ll hurt his feelings, it’s because you’re afraid he may react badly. This guy is not only a bad match, he could also be abusive. If you’re worried about this, proceed with some caution. Some suggest that it’s a good idea to have friends around when he’s the one having to move out. Alternatively, if it’s you who needs to move out, do it with the help of your friends.
#3. He doesn’t respond when you cry
In a healthy relationship, you’re not aiming for the other person to be sad or upset. While some guys might not know how to handle crying or emotions, yours seems to avoid it altogether. You deserve someone with a little more compassion. When you break up with your boyfriend, you may realize that many of your tears were actually based on things he did or said.
#4. He openly flirts with other girls
It’s one thing to be flirty, but another to make your girlfriend feel insecure. A good boyfriend will make it clear that he only has eyes for you. By being flirty, you may also start feeling a little nervous during his time away from the home. He may just be hanging out with friends, but you’ll naturally wonder if he’s picking up phone numbers while you’re out of sight. This is a clear sign to break up with your boyfriend, and doing so will set you both free.
#5. He doesn’t excite you anymore
Sometimes, the most stable men are slightly dull. And if you’re not looking to go out and seek adventure, he may be the perfect match. But if you’re constantly waiting around for him to ask you out on a date, or feel bored every weekend since you’re doing the same thing as the last, you may want to break up with him.
If it’s simply a personality issue, consider being polite and sincere when you end things. MindBodyGreen believes that the best way to break up with someone in a kind manner is to just do it, and stop leading them on. Obviously doing it in person is best, but if you’re unable to do it that way, IM or email work. Just don’t ghost him, that’s totally unfair.
#6. People have warned you about him
If you’re no longer a teenager, you’re past the age where your friends might talk you out of dating someone based on their own gain. Real friends have your back and don’t want you to end up hurt. If you trust the people around you, you should really listen to their concerns. Sometimes it’s hard to notice red flags when you’re in a fresh relationship.
#7. Your life is at a standstill
In your head, you wanted to get married and have children someday. But the guy you’re with isn’t interested in proposing. And even if he’s told you he wants kids, he’s not taking action to grow up and make some changes. The popular quote from Maya Angelou, “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time,” rings true here. It’s okay if he wants to keep things slow, but it’s also okay to break up with your boyfriend if you don’t.
#8. You’re no longer attracted to him
This is a tough point, as people do change. If your boyfriend gained 15 pounds, go easy on him. But if he suddenly became inactive and stopped caring about his personal appearance, that’s another story (it’s also a sign that he may be struggling with mental health issues, so you might want to make sure he sees someone who can help).You also might no longer be attracted to his personality. If he’s radically different from the way he was when you started dating, you have the right to end the relationship.
Remember, people break up for plenty of different reasons. You never need permission to end your relationship if it’s something you feel is right. Sometimes the spark is just gone and never comes back. Just remember that you’re not a bad person if you want to break up with your boyfriend. Be honest and be confident that you’re doing what’s best for you both.